I love when I hear something inspiring that makes me think or reflect on my own experiences. I was fortunate enough to have some inspiration this past Sunday, when I heard Elizabeth Gilbert speak about her new book, Big Magic (P.s. Buy it! – locally please!). Her new book is about living a creative life, and the purpose of fear. She said that fear should not be completely gone from your life, and that fear and creativity actually depend on each other. She told us fear is more than welcome to join her throughout her journey with creativity, but in no way is fear allowed to make any decisions or have a voice. I absolutely loved this. Elizabeth wrote a letter to fear telling it just that: that it had no voice in her life, but its presence is more than welcome.
This inspired me to write my own letter to fear. My personal acceptance of its purpose and putting it in its place. Fear and I have come through hell and high water. Sometimes I could win, and tell fear to shove it, but more often than anything, fear found a way to make me feel vulnerable and afraid of an outcome I wasn’t sure of. When I first started writing this letter, I couldn’t stop thinking about The Little Rascals and the lovely note that was sent to Darla (for reference, please see video). I wanted to so badly to grill at my fear and tell it to stay out of my business and that it truly did make me want to vomit. In my head there was so much I wanted to yell at fear for. For all the times it held me back to living a my creative life, but I decided to take a step back and be really honest with my fear. To let it know that I did appreciate it for being there, because like Elizabeth Gilbert had mentioned during her talk, “If you live without fear, you would pretty much be a sociopath” (not exactly the direct quote, but close enough). So I decided to take a crack at writing to my fear as truthfully as I could, and I decided to share it with you all.
How’s life treating you inside my head? You have been putting in a lot of extra hours lately, and for that, I respect your want to work over time, but it doesn’t mean you will be compensated for it. I wanted you to know that I am no longer trying to quit you. That I am okay that you are up there in my head, giving me all the ways things can go wrong with what I want to do. What I am thankful for is that you have no place in my heart. My heart belongs to me and my creativity. You know creativity, right? I’m sure you have met before. Its the one that you push off the swings every now and then because you aren’t the biggest fan of sharing my mind. Well, creativity and I have had enough of your bullying. Creativity and I have the reins in this here body of mine, and I would like for it to stay that way. I know that you are here for a reason, and that sometimes I will hear your voice and start to feel my palms sweat and my anxiety kick in, but instead of listening and following your voice, I’m going to turn to my heart and let creativity be my guide.
Forever and always, but never in charge you will forever be.
All my love,